Why the den?

It's your War Room

You don’t lead from behind, you lead from the front.  This means being proactive and set apart.  You need your personal space to give you that separation and perspective.  Leadership is being in front, cutting the vines and clearing the jungle. It’s not easy, but it is rewarding.

It's Sanctuary

Your personal space is your sanctuary.  It’s the place you call your own.  It’s where you go to be private, to think, to dream, to hurt.  Leading is not easy and men take damage, they have to make hard decisions and difficult calls, and after, the leader needs a moment to reflect.

That is what we are here for.  We are here to help you make those decisions, make them in a way that is fair, even handed, and thoughtful.  It’s also a place to work on your inner self and become stronger as a person, and stronger as a leader. 

What we offer

The Poly Mind

The poly mind is for young men to explore themselves, and their leadership potential.  It’s not only for poly minded men, however, anyone can learn the basic values of leadership and command, and apply them in their daily lives.

The Poly Husband

The Poly Husband is a continuation of the Poly Mind.  It’s a sanctuary for men who have decided that the polygyny life is for them, and offers a forum, chatrooms, and Q&A sections for information gathering and self development.

The Poly Connection

When you feel you are ready to take on more responsibility, then the Poly Connection is our connection app.  Think dating site, but with like minded people who all want the same things.  Everyone on the site will be personally vetted.

Why be a leader?

Leaders lead.  They are out in front of everyone else, cutting the paths, making the decisions.  You can lead, or you can follow and not everyone wants to be a leader.

But our society is failing.  The birth rate is lower than 1930, and marriage rates are at an all time low.  Families have nearly ceased to be.  What about the kids?  Easy prey.

So that is why you should be a leader.  You can identify the places where change is needed, and then make those changes.  You can grow strong families that are a beacon to our nation.  This is why the logo on the men’s pages, leaders are that beacon.  They are the ones saying, “Join me and let’s make history together.

Leaders lead themselves first, then others.  This means self control, calm thoughtful decision making, and compassion for others.  Is this you?  If it is, then we want you here, even if you don’t want anything to do with plural marriage.  Plural marriage is the furnace that tempers leaders, and you can learn a lot from our struggles and triumphs.

common questions

Yes, and no.  The Poly Connection is free, as is the Poly Mind and the Poly Woman.  However, there is a small fee for the Poly Connection, the Poly Wife and the Poly Husband.  The Poly Connection is a dating site that takes resources to operate.  The poly wife and husband are both social media sites with forums, chat-rooms, and other benefits to poly minded people, so there is a small fee to cover the cost of operating them.

The site is about leadership.  The Poly Mind is about men who want to find out if this lifestyle is cut out for them.  Even if you choose that it is not, the resources available are well worth hanging around.

Not yet.  Soon we will be offering classes with the Poly Husband.

No.  It’s about family.  A man can only have sex so often, and if anything he gets less than in monogamy.  It’s also a bit more complicated with favorites, job requirements, and other issues. 

This question always irritates me, because it’s based on a number of false premises.  For instance, do you know any women who would want to be, “Collected,” into a household?  Or are so weak minded that they cannot find the door knob and walk out at any time?  Polygyny is about FAMILY.  Family means education, self improvement, and growth.

Not every women would like this.  Some women are all about celibacy, and some are about monogamy.  They want to be alone, or they want that long lifetime hug that is monogamy.  But some women want a family and a career as well.   They want their hobbies but they also want to come home to a place they are wanted and desired.  So many women who look at plural marriage are professional, artistic, or adventurers.  They want their cake and to eat it, too.

Leadership is standing up and standing out.  It’s self discipline and becoming damned good at what you do.  It’s looking at the Big Picture and not the Day to Day.  It’s not monogamy.  Leaders are confident, self respecting and honorable.  Many leaders are also Givers. 

Man break down into general personalities.  Leaders, Followers, and Wanderers.

Leaders lead.  They enjoy the thrill of making decisions, of getting out in front.  Of having people rely on them and ask them questions.

Followers are support staff in a way.  Followers do not want to lead, they want to follow a leader.  On a busy highway, the follower will find someone going a reasonable pace, and settle in behind them.  In life, they will seek out the strong manager and try to impress them.

Wanderers are unique in that they have no desire to lead, but they also have no desire to follow.  They will be the person who drives a semi because something neat is over that next hill.  They are comfortable being alone.

Followers and Wanderers are welcome to join our site, and enjoy the company.  You can learn a lot here about what leaders expect and how to be a great follower.

Absolutely!  Followers often make the best leaders.  This is actually what the word Submission in the New Testament means… it means a natural leader submitting to the leadership of another.  Think of it this way, it’s like a Captain submitting to a General.  Both are leaders, and both have followers, but when someone is better than you are, you submit to their leadership to learn from them, and grow as a leader in your own right.

Leadership always helps marriages.  Polygyny can destroy them, however.  A family is built on a foundation, and if you change the foundation then the marriage will react in unexpected ways.  But if you focus not on polygyny but on Leadership, then you will improve your marriage.

Yes, but we are not licensed therapists.  We can offer advice, give you some methods to try that may or may not assist you with an issue, and you can certainly offer you an ear or shoulder to lean on.  And yes, we have a place for your wife to learn as well.  Oh, while the Poly Husband is male only and the Poly Wife is female only, the poly woman and the poly mind are open to all sexes.

They are literally the foundation that you build your married life on.  Foundational Marriage starts from the engagement period, with steps to follow to get to the marriage and then rules to follow after.  You’ll find more on our websites.